tHERES A SKELETON INSIDE MY BODY RIGHT NOW OH MY GOD
well stop having random sex with the skeletons in your house
"Oh, they DO carry it in a muted pastel! Well, that’s embarrassing…"
how i imagine the home life of my white friends
Daughter tells her Dad he’s going to be a Grandpa [x]
When he says “really” ;’)
Never leave this un-reblogged
What a dear human being he is.
The Boston Symphony was performing Beethoven’s Ninth. In the piece, there’s a long passage about 20 minutes during which the double basses have nothing to do. Rather than sit around the whole time looking stupid, some bassists decided to sneak offstage and go to the tavern next door for a quick one. After slamming several beers in quick succession (as double bassists are prone to do), one of them looked at his watch. “Hey! We need to get back!”
"No need to panic," said a fellow bassist.
"I thought we might need some extra time, so I tied the last few pages of the conductor’s score together with string. It’ll take him a few minutes to get it untangled."
A few moments later they staggered back to the concert hall and took their places in the orchestra. About this time, a member of the audience noticed the conductor seemed a bit edgy and said as much to her companion.
"Well, of course," said her companion. "Don’t you see?
It’s the bottom of the Ninth, the score is tied, and the bassists are loaded.”
King Baby says No
TIL that the idea of fire insurance was invented in Montreal.
According to Cambridge University historian Clive Trebilcock, Phoenix “invented the export of fire insurance in 1783,” writing its first overseas policy that year.
Someone left this post-it on my desk and I don’t think I’ll ever recover.
why dont humans have a specific noise that means “there are bees here lets leave immediately” why are elephants more advanced than us
we do have a specific noise, it sounds like this:
“there are bees here lets leave immediately”